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Conversation Starters for Couples

Mukta Gaikwad Feb 20, 2019
Couples are usually at a loss of words after spending months and years with one another. Read ahead for some interesting conversation starters that will help revive your boring relationship.
Every couple, at some point reaches a stage in their life where silence is only what they hear of each other. It's a natural change in the relationship when you have spent a year or two together and now know everything that needs to be known. However, silence can and does, most of the time, create a rift between two people that becomes too much to handle.
Conversation starters are a great way to rediscover the lost romance between a couple and the sweet-and-sour relationship that binds the two of them. It may seem very juvenile to have conversation topics listed out since the time you have been together. But, they are only meant to give you a push to revitalize your communication with your partner.

Bring Out Old Memories

The best way to refresh your relationship is to talk about the past that you have shared. It makes you remember your younger days, and who does not want to go back to those times? These memories can trigger off the lost charm between the couple. They are a powerful tool that may help you get rid of the monotony of daily life and enter the glorious past.
Ask him: "Do you remember our first date? I had changed about 20 pairs of clothes to find the perfect one for that date. Oh, we were so shy and nervous ..."
This reminds him about the first date that you had gone for and how shy the two of you were with fluttering heartbeats and nervousness. You can talk about the date and how each of you had felt that day. Continue the conversation by talking about the following dates and how you eventually fell in love. Enjoy a recap of your own relationship.
Ask her: "I think the most romantic moment in our lives was on your birthday when we had just started seeing each other. You looked beautiful that day. What do you think has been the most romantic moment of our lives?"
This line not only brings back a fond memory of your life, it also pushes her to think of another such memory. It helps you gain an insight into her own memories, and it also gives you two topics to talk about and even compare with each other.

Look into the Future

The future in any couple's life is as important as the present, or their past. Get talking to each other about your future aspirations and goals. It will help you gain perspective as a couple and even as an individual. Ask questions and give opinions! This will also help you refresh your outlook towards the plans in your life.
Ask him: "We work hard and save a lot. What is the one thing that you would want to buy for yourself in the future?"

As a couple, you have a future to live together. Asking him a question on what he would like to buy in the near future gives you an insight deeper than what is apparent. His answer will depend on what he wants in his near future.
Men, generally tend to avoid topics of the future. This question provides a subtle, yet effective way to get into his psyche and understand his thoughts.
Ask her: "I can picture us growing old together, sitting in a rocking chair, and having a good time. What do you think it will be like for us at that age?"
Women love to hear about the future. If she is not a commitment freak, she will instantly smile at your sentence. They enjoy planning and picturing. And before you can ask her, she will launch into her own version of your future and how she sees it.

Your Kinda Love

No two love stories are the same. Every couple has its own flaws and strengths. Talking about them only helps you understand your relationship better. So talk about yourselves, not as two individuals but as one couple. Dynamics of a couple change over time. Talk about where you lack and where you are better off than others.
Ask him: "Where do you think we lack as a perfect couple? I think we need to go out on more dinner dates."
Tell him. Let him know. Men like women who just come out and say it on the face. They do not enjoy beating around the bush. For them, clarity about the woman's needs and her expectations are important. So, talking to him about your views is a good idea. Also, ask him about his view and opinions. Make sure that you work on them too!
Ask her: "If you could change one thing about our love story, what would you change?"

Make her think about your love story, and then make her think even more about what she would want to be changed.
It will help release emotions that she may have never dared to do in the past -- something that hurt her, someday that you did not call, etc. Women can be really touchy about topics like that. However, she might not let you know on the face. So, bring it out of her with smartness. It will help you understand her better and you will get it off her chest, too.

Silly Stuff

As a couple, everybody ends up doing silly things in life. From cooking up a disastrous dish for your other half to goofing up with surprises, the list for a couple can go on. Talk about those very silly things and lighten up the mood. You will be surprised at how much the two of you will laugh.
Ask him: "Which one do you think has been our silliest fight till date?"

Lighten up the mood by talking about how you guys ended up fighting on the silliest topic ever. Couples tend to pick fights with each other when they are either frustrated, or bored. It is normal human nature to do so. Talk about it and find yourselves getting into a lighter mood.
Ask her: "What do you think is the silliest thing that I have ever done?"

Remind her about how silly you have been. For females, a man being silly equals to him being cute.
They will look back at the memory fondly, and all the love will come rushing back. But DO NOT ask, or remind her about how silly she has been. It will just put her into a bad mood and make her think how she goofed up. Talk about light stuff, and make each other laugh.

Personal Adventures

Talk about the adventures each of you have had in your lives; maybe a trip to some camp, or a mountaineering adventure. You may even have talked about stuff like this before and know all about it, but refreshing them will get your other half into a great mood. Listen to them and get excited at their excitement.
Ask him: "What was the most adventurous thing you ever did in your life?"

Be direct, and then watch him getting all psyched up about all the adventures he has had in his life. Men will never pass up an opportunity to talk about stuff like this. It boosts their ego. Question him about the details and let them know how impressed you are.
Ask her: "If you could pick one adventurous sport to do right now, what would you do?"

Women tend to have a few adventures to list. Of course there are exceptions. So, instead ask her what adventure would she like to embark on in the future. You can discuss details and even plan a surprise for her with that adventure if it is possible.

Share Secrets!!!

A couple may have stayed together for a long time. But many a time, some secrets tend to escape away without being shared. Go back to those dear diary moments and dig out some dirt. Ask each other and talk about secrets that may have slipped in the past. However, remember not to overreact or get angry.
Tell him:"I have a secret that I have never told you about ..."

Don't ask him any questions. Rather open up your own pot of stories. Asking him will make him think that you are accusing him of hiding something. So, take up the topic all by yourself and give him a little extra insight on you. You can very subtly ask him to share his little secrets if any.
Tell her: "I have a secret to tell you. But only if you tell me a secret about yourself first!"
Yes, this sounds school girlish, but every girl has a tiny school girl inside her and it will jump up at the opportunity to know a secret. She will open up her strings only to hear your story. So go ahead and hear her reveal. But say this to her only if you have one of your own to share. Otherwise, she may just get hurt.

All Our Fears

Nobody wants to let others know about their deepest fears. They are generally a sign of weakness. But revealing them to your loved one only strengthens your relationship. It showcases your trust towards the other person and brings about a positive energy in the relationship.
Tell him: "You are the strength in my life. But I am scared of ..."

Just list the things you are scared of, while constantly assuring him how he is the reason for you being strong. Let him know that you enjoy being protected and loved by him. If you have any problems, talk them out here. Fears are to be shared with your other half and worked upon, so do that.
Tell her: "I am afraid of two things in my life. And one of them is losing you."
She will obviously ask you what the other is, so tell her about it. Tell her all your fears and let her know that you are afraid of losing her as much as you are afraid of anything else. Share your feelings. Enjoy the attention when she soothes and calms you, while she ensures you that she will always be there for you.

Crazy Stuff

Going crazy is the right way to go when you just want to have fun. And everybody does crazy things in life. So, jump that wagon and talk about all the weird and crazy stuff you have done in your life. Joke about it, talk about it, reminiscence, and laugh.
Ask him: "What is the craziest thing you have ever done for anybody in your life?"

Men do a lot of crazy stuff. To find out how crazy your man has been in life, ask him more about his craziness and delve deeper. Try to learn why he did the crazy stuff and for whom. You'll get a fresh perspective on him and understand the reason behind his behavioral patterns.
Ask her: "Have you ever done something so crazy that you have not told anybody about?"

It is like a crazy, little secret. And women are known for being crazy and going overboard. Ask her, but do not push. Make her comfortable. She can get offended at too much inquisitiveness. Let her know that being crazy is normal and mean it.

The Child in You

Fond childhood memories are always a conversation starter. Talk to each other about your childhood and how each of you grew up. Talk about your parents and their parenting methods. They will help you gain an insight into why one does and does not do certain things.
Ask him: "Who was your best friend in your childhood days?"

A simple question will bring back memories flooding for him and he will just start talking -- how they became friends, what pranks they have pulled, all the fun they have had, etc. In one simple question, you will find lots of other doors opening up.
Ask her: "What were your expectations from your Prince Charming as a teenager?"

Yes, that image still exists somewhere in the heart of a woman. Try to bring it out. Talk to her and discuss it with her. It is a great conversation starter and also reveals to you her expectations then and how she has changed since those days.

Office, Office!

The workplace environment is where you spend one-third of your weekdays. It is a very important element in forming your personality and may even change your behavior over time. Ask questions about work and show interest. Be genuinely inquisitive about their professional life.
Ask him: "If you could have a career change, would you go for it? And if so, what would you choose?"
This will let you know whether he is happy or not at his current workplace. Men do not discuss their work on their own unless prodded. However, a question like that will tell him that you want to know and he will open up the gates. Not only will he talk about his current workplace, but it will also reveal the expectations he has from life and himself.
Ask her:"Would you want to have a career after you have kids?"
Even if you are not married, this question gives you a conversation that will provide great insight into the working of her mind and how strongly she feels about her career. It will also tell you how she would like to raise her kids. Get into the flow of the conversation, but do not get judgmental. Respect her decision, whatever it may be.
For those of you who think that marriages are made in heaven, it's not true. Love and relationships happen right here, by confirming compatibility. These conversation starters will help you know how compatible you are with your partner. They will point the areas of your married life that need to be worked on. Communication is the key to a happy marraige.