"It is better to be told a hurtful truth than to be told a comforting lie." - Unknown
Whether you're dating a man, or married to him, the male species function the same way when it comes to cheating on their women. It isn't hard to decipher the signs of a rift wedging itself in between the two of you, because the first sign is that things start to change.
The changes are obvious and easy to identify, if you're willing to keep your eyes open and notice them. It is so rare for a woman to find someone she can spend the rest of her life with, not having to worry about him sneaking off to another woman.
From what we know, marrying a guy who is likely to cheat on you, or has in the past, is a risky move. That is why you have to be sure deep down in your gut, that this guy is for real, and that trust is what you two share above all other aspects of the relationship/marriage.
For those women caught up in a whirlwind of doubts, we know how hard it is for you to cope with your man cheating on you. So in this help section, we'll take you on a step by step method of snooping around, in a stealthy, and smart manner.
Ways to Catch a Cheating Husband
So how do you catch a cheating husband? Simple - just know him well enough to follow a pattern of action. Confused? Let's be more clear. When a man works around a routine that is followed right down to the tee, he doesn't change that systematic plan unless something is up.
Let's say for instance that he wasn't the sort to sit online late at night, and he's now telling you it has something to do with work, and that he has to log on every night right after dinner to follow-up on that. Do you question this or just take it as it comes? Stop and think about if your husband even has a job that needs him to correspond from at home.
If he has the Internet at the office, why sit online this late? Can't it wait till the morning? Does he get protective when you approach and look hassled like he was doing something he shouldn't have? Learn how to read his face, the way he moves - after all he is your husband, and you should be able to decode every move made.
The obvious thing guys do is erase log on history before they log out. Some might forget to do this, giving you a chance to see something that could give you a lead about if he's up to something or not. If there's a way you can access his email, then that would be a sure way of finding something suspicious, and informative.
You can briefly browse through his phone and make a mental note about any weird nicknames saved, or female names that you may not have heard of, or heard of (if it's a colleague or friend).
Some men may be tired or just lose out on that will to be a part of the sexual act - but it is important to have that physical connection going no matter how old you are, or how long you've been married. Intimacy is key to keep things fresh, different in the bedroom, to have something to be able to look forward to and enjoy with the one you're married to.
Some men stow away a stash of condoms, or letters or gifts, or even something that belongs to his mistress. Checking his dresser draws, or little nooks in his wardrobe, might just fetch you some vital proof.
If he keeps something locked away, where the keys are hidden elsewhere, then approaching him about this would be ideal, but make sure it's not just documents he's keeping safe, but something secretive. Keep an eye out on how he behaves around this locked space.
If he walks away when he does this, the odds that it's a woman are as high as 85%, and if it's a man/friend/family member/colleague, well, why walk away and maintain a distance from you? Noticing these key traits, will have you on to him.
Too Busy to Spend Time With You
If he's got other things to do like disappear for long trips or tell you he's got a game to go to with the guys, then your cue is to make sure that is exactly what he's doing. If he's taking a trip; make sure you know the hotel/friend's place he's staying at (call to find out if this place is legit).
If he's going to meet his friends; make a call to one of them and purposely tell him that you tried calling your husband and weren't getting through, if he says he has to work late in the office; be smart enough to have his office numbers. It isn't easy to digest all this information, but knowing is better than not.
This may sound a wee bit dramatic, but nonetheless it's worth a shot in finding out the answer to, is your husband cheating on you. Having your husband followed by either yourself or a private investigator, would give you the answers you seek for in no time at all.
Hiring one is easy, and finding out what you can will be a cinch. Just make sure you know how to cover your tracks, and avail of a reliable source. Don't tell your girlfriends what you're up to because they'll just blow your cover, for want of gossip.
If you do find what you're looking for, be it proof of infidelity, or absolutely nothing to worry about, the former should be dealt with a calm and composed confrontation. Do not lose your cool, and don't ridicule him, it'll only make him want to lash out, and justify himself. Give him a reason to feel guilty and disgusted with himself.
The best thing to do, is to be all he wants you to be, to see for himself that this is who he belongs with, and not in the arms of another woman. Seek marriage counseling to help you cope with this time, and salvage what you can for the sake of your marriage, and the kids (if any). So using these ideas, find out what you need, and work it out as time lapses.