Breakups can often leave you filled with anger, depression, anxiety, and loneliness. We tend to say or do things that we didn't mean to, and regret them later. The sadness and the feeling of vulnerability that accompanies a situation where you have broken up with someone you love, or feel like the relationship is fading fast, is like no other. The desperation to be with the person you love makes you wonder how to get them back and rekindle the relationship and romance once more. However, the dire need to get back the person you love can make people do a number of strange things which are, of course, totally wrong!
So while your idea of displaying your love may be constant texting, sending small presents and flowers, and worse, stalking every move of your ex, you will just end up looking like a maniac to the other person. Rather than acting desperate and begging your ex to come back, use these simple tips to know how you can get back with your ex.
Tips to Winning Back the Love of Your Life
You can use these simple relationship advice tips to give your relationship a second chance.
Understand the problems in your relationship
Understanding the problems and what went wrong can help you devise a plan to get the person back in your life. The problems will crop up again if you do not understand and address them now. So, if it was your possessiveness that made him/her run for their life, then you need to figure out if you can change it. Just telling them that you will change and not really wanting to change, can spell disaster in your relationship all over again. Before you get all emotional and desperate for your partner to return, figure out what you want and be honest to yourself. Address your own faults and baggage, forgive them and yourself, and move towards your new life one day at a time. Ask yourself if you really want that person back or that relationship again. Think whether you really want the person back because you love him/her or just want them to hang around because you are lonely. This is really important!
Letting go and moving on
This advice may probably sound very strange to you, but it is when you let go of the person that you can get him/her to come back again. Give the other person some time and space, and let him/her come to terms with their feelings. Don't just expect the other person to come back, instead shower him/her with love and care. Pestering your ex by calling or texting too often, writing love poems, or sending flowers, can widen the rift between the two of you. So, cut the chase and let your ex know that you have started moving on in life. Sometimes, showing the other person that you are not at all worried about the outcome of the relationship and being happy can make the other person realize how much he/she misses you in their life. Try not to be available for them always, unless you want them to start taking you for granted all over again.
Focus on yourself
Rather than moping around and grieving all the time, focus on yourself. No guy or girl wants a wimpy, groveling lover. Stay cool, go out with friends and family, and enjoy your life and have loads of fun. In short, stay busy! That does not mean you are acting like a snob or being rude to your ex, and just be polite and friendly each time you meet. Do all that you've wanted to do when you were in a relationship and carry yourself with more confidence. Go on solo trips, pursue your hobbies, join a gym or dance class, and get yourself a makeover. These will help you rejuvenate and get a better understanding of things in your life. Hang out with your friends more often, whom you've been ignoring to be with your now-ex.
Stay in contact and have a chat once or twice. Sometimes, pretending hard-to-get and not interested can make the person realize how much he/she needs you in their life. This does not mean that you go around dating his/her best friend to get the point across, but rather live your life and play things cool. Call or text sometimes and show that you still care for them even after your break up. Again, don't go overboard with calling and texting them. You don't want to sound too needy and desperate to get back.
Clear your misunderstandings
If you guys had a big fight or an argument, and you sill feel the need to be heard, then go ahead and talk it out calmly. Also, give him/her the chance to say and put their thoughts forward. Do not argue this time! You don't want things to deteriorate further, do you? Don't play the blame game; this might just worsen the situation. Make him/her realize that you still have feelings for them, and how much they mean to you. Make them believe that both of you can work out things together. Take it really slow this time, and don't expect to be welcomed back with open arms. Watch your step and stay away from any kind of topic or subject that may trigger an argument.
Spend time with each other
After you've started talking on a regular basis, ask her out again on a date. As for girls, wait for him to ask you out. If he/she accepts, then you have a green signal to go ahead and rekindle the lost relationship. However, don't rush on to things this soon. Take things one step at a time. Say and do what you really mean. When you think the time is right, ask him/her about the relationship and hope for the best!
Once you work on these things, getting back your ex will be easier. Remember, impatience is your enemy, so although losing someone can be rough, ask yourself some hard and honest questions, think about it, and then approach the love of your life. Consistency and patience is the key here. So, if you are serious about your relationship, rebuild the trust and rekindle the affection that you once had.