Do you understand your spouse? Does your spouse understand you? How often do you have serious conversations? Do you argue over silly things a lot? While there are some married couples who feel that they communicate well, there are many who can do better. Communicating can sometimes be the difference between having a divorce and working things out. Here are some issues that people should learn to feel comfortable about discussing with their life partner.
Talk about sex. It is so important to discuss this openly. Sex is an incredibly intimate thing, and within marriage it is sacred and special. Be honest about your likes and dislikes, frequency, duration, methods, etc. Conversations like these can actually save a marriage and remove the temptation for infidelity. This discussion should also involve what usually happens before and after sex, not just during. Open communication in this area can really spice up the bedroom action and create a stronger bond that you will notice on a daily basis.
Talk about money. Who is making the money, you, your spouse, both of you? Talk about your views on money management and spending habits (both individual and as a couple), and figure out ways you can better handle money as a couple. Many advise married couples to have joint accounts; there should be enough trust and security in the relationship to do that. Financial security is much stronger when you pool resources. Married partners should be aware of each other's income. Sharing money also creates a healthy bond of trust in a marriage.
Talk about the children. Discipline habits should be unified. Talk about your views on raising your children in general. You should also check with each other before making permission decisions. Never allow your children to do things behind your partner's back. Parents should be a team, and when you disagree you should talk things out in private, not in front of the kids. When the parents are divided on issues, children will try to manipulate the situation. This can cause anger and division in the family, and that is never a good thing. Both should be willing to reach a compromise, and raise the children together.
It is crucial that these issues are dealt with before a serious issue. Even after years of marriage, these conversations are extremely relevant, and they should happen every once in a while. Sometimes views and circumstances change, and updates are needed. Keep the lines of communication open for that.
Sex, money, and children are the most commonly argued issues within a marriage. Healthy, honest communication in these areas could save a troubled marriage, and strengthen a good one even further. The deep trust that is required may not come easily to you or your partner, and the first conversation may not even go well. The important thing is that you keep trying to communicate and compromise so that you can keep your household running well, and allow your love for each other to grow.
Talk things out with your spouse. If you have fears about sharing how you feel, start by talking about that first. It will be worth it in the end for you, your relationship, and your family.