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Advice on How to Make an Open Relationship Work

Geeta Dhavale Jan 6, 2019
Open relationships can be tricky, more so if the path is not tread carefully. Humans are one of the most complicated species when it comes to relationships, no less when it comes to open relationships. Here are some crucial advice so that you can live through a happier relationship.
If you enter an open relationship without understanding its ground rules and consequences, your relationship could very well pass an examination for the most disastrous relationship ever and bring along some really massive emotional and mental trauma.
So be careful! It is not as easy as it sounds. You just cannot walk in and walk out of a relationship just because it is 'open'. Such relationships have their own pros and cons and come with their own emotional baggage that you may have to deal with if it doesn't work out.
An open relationship is something in which couples have an emotional attachment with each other, but they give each other the freedom to have physical relationships with others. There are many reasons why they choose to be in one over being committed, not that the partners are not committed to each other in the former kind, only not so when it comes to sex.
Sometimes, couples are not sexually satisfied with each other, sometimes they are in search of the 'right person', some couples like to have a 'variety' in life without feeling guilty about it, and others just do not want to miss out on the goodness of life. The reasons could be numerous.
But, don't think they have the freedom to walk in or walk out of a relationship at any point of life. Well, on the contrary, it involves a lot of responsibility where you also have to fulfill your duties before enjoying the freedom. Be sure of the given things before you plunge into one yourself.

Do You Both Really Want It?

This is the first question you should ask yourselves as a couple. Make sure that you both want 'such' a relationship and only then can you expect it to work.
If your partner is not ready for it, then you might have to just chuck the idea or your partner, it is up to you. You two must be on the same page, both mentally and socially. Ultimately, you need to be happy with your relationship that is built on trust, maturity, and honesty.

Have Rules

As someone rightly said that, absolute freedom creates chaos and hence, some rules are necessary. Similarly, every relationship should also have rules and boundaries for the people involved in it.
In case of an open relationship, discuss some important rules that must be followed by both the partners. For example, not using the bedroom you share, or not having 'extra relationship' (like, extramarital) sex in your house, or not having sex with common friends or exes, etc. Such rules will ensure that you will cause less emotional trauma for each other.

Insecurity, Jealousy, Ego

These are 'the' three things that you must keep your open relationship away from. The feeling of insecurity is the biggest threat. People feel insecure that their partners would leave them for someone else and this can spoil the relationship.
Jealousy and ego, again, are some of the crucial issues that are difficult to handle, especially for men. The fact that your partner is also having sex with others just like you, is quite difficult to digest. So, always remember that you opted for such a relationship from all the choices available.

Talk it Out

Remember it's an open relationship! So share and discuss your feelings, experiences, and emotions with each other frequently. You two have a different outlook towards life and relationships so you might as well share it with each other.
Apart from this, you must also confront your jealousy, insecurities, and other trust issues in the relationship with each other so you can resolve them with some hearty promises and commitments. And analyze regularly if both of you are really happy, irrespective of what others think about it.

Have Safe Sex

Multiple partners can come with multiplied risk of sexually transmitted diseases. It is important to practice safe sex as your own health along with the health of your partner and other sexual partners is at stake.
Be aware of different sexually transmitted diseases and always use precautions while having sex. It is also important to be honest with other partners you have sex with to avoid emotional problems and in order to not cheat them.
This was some basic advice that will save you from the emotional mess that usually comes from being in an open relationship. Another important thing you must consider is its unconventionality, which adds to the challenge and complexities of maintaining a healthy relationship.
But, if you are convinced with your lifestyle and are honest about what you really want in life, the social factors shall not bother you or affect your relationships.