Distance between two hearts is not an obstacle; rather a beautiful reminder of just how strong true love can be ~ Unknown
If you have kids, add a small expectation of a bedtime story. These are the sweet things, we believe, what marriages are made of. However, when the stark reality of your spouse's career stares at you, this picture you painted can shatter. A job that keeps your spouse away, can take an emotional and physical toll on you.
No matter what reasons you may find to console yourself, a spouse being away, for the better part of a month, is not a picture anyone desires. So, what do you do? How do you survive this sudden change of expectations from your marriage? Well, all you need is a pinch of creativity and some out of the box planning, to make your marriage work.
Set Aside Some Time
Many people would ridicule the fact that you need to make an appointment with your spouse to have a decent conversation. But then again, they are not living your reality. When your spouse is on the road, especially traveling outside the country, it becomes increasingly necessary to catch up with each other.
Of course, there will be days when you might not be able to talk for certain reasons. However, there is no harm in trying an arrangement that might actually work for the two of you. In fact, it might benefit in more ways than what you can imagine.
If the two of you like to write, you can share an online document and maintain a diary or share a travelogue. This is a fresh perspective on how you can connect, besides the usual telephone calls. Sharing moments of the day with each other will allow the two of you to imagine or visualize what the other person's day has been like.
Leave Voice Messages
Smartphones have now become an integral part of our daily lives. Making smart use of it to keep the connection in your marriage would be rather clever. With various voice message applications, we can send sweet loves notes at odd hours, without having to worry about disturbing the other person.
If you have kids, you can record bedtime stories, let them know that you love them and that you will be home soon. The key point here, is to express your love and the fact that you are missing your family. Just saying these simple things can make your spouse's day and let them know that they are cared for.
Staying back, being alone, managing the kids, and a job, can be a laborious job. When your spouse goes away, you can take a day off, sit back, catch up on the reading with a cup of coffee while your kids are away. Also, when one person is away there is one mouth less to feed.
Get Your Kids Involved
The other repercussion of your spouse being away is that your kids start interacting less with the parent who is away. Thus, it is important to talk to your kids about your spouse's travel plans and kind of work they do. This will help your kids to understand and respect their parent's need to be away.
Find and Pursue a Hobby
Our parents have pushed us to do this all our lives. This advice may come in handy right now too. If you've found one, then pursue it. Or find one and pursue it. A hobby will help you take your mind off your troubles and worries. Joining a class is also a great way of meeting new people and opening doors to new forms of happiness.
Rituals of Sweet Nothings
Everyone has their own way of showing love. It can be 'love you' at the end of a phone call or a way of greeting every time you see each other. Similarly, make a goodbye ritual. For instance, never leave without a kiss, take a picture every time you are about to leave, slip a love note in his wallet or other sweet nothings that will make goodbyes happier.
Being home while your spouse travels can be very frustrating. Try not to be lonely, by making plans with friends and family. Accepting the nature of their work, and helping yourself and your kids to accept the change, is an important move in balancing life when your spouse travels a lot.
Losing your calm over your spouse's travel will only drive a wedge in your relationship. Remember, the bigger picture of your marriage matters above everything else.