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For the First Date: Conversation Starters, Questions, and Tips

Hrushikesh Oka Mar 19, 2019
First dates can be a lot of pressure. A lot of the time, you don't know what to talk about. Read ahead for some great conversation starters and questions to ask your date.
First dates are difficult for everyone. Each person is trying to impress the other, and there is a lot of pressure involved. A good idea is to go out for a cup of coffee; this will give you a chance to sit down and talk, and get to know each other without putting too much pressure on yourself.

Conversation Starters

To begin with, you are going to need some conversation starters.
  • Getting started is slightly hard, so you can get around this problem by initiating the conversation with a brief introduction of yourself. After this, perhaps your date will tell you a bit about herself and you can take it from there.
  • Talk about some current event, such as a sporting event like world cup football or a major news story.
  • Perhaps you could compliment her; tell her she looks nice.
  • An important part of a person's life is their job, so you could ask where she works and what she does.
  • Ask her what books she's read or what movies she's seen lately.
  • Family is always a good topic, so you can ask her about her brothers and sisters.
  • Pose questions that require a longer answer than "How are you?".


  • The first date is tricky as it consists of virtual strangers trying to get to know each other. It helps to know some prior information about your date.
  • Another way is to be prepared with some standard or common topics say about the news, new movies, new books, or that new bistro that just opened downtown.
  • Your conversation should be interesting enough to prompt your date to think for a bit.
  • If you can tell a good joke, that's a great way to see what her sense of humor is like.
  • Once you have broken the ice you can just take it on from there.

Conversation Topics

  • Hobbies: This is an important aspect of a person's life. They reveal the person's interests and what they do with their free time.
  • Family: This is an interesting topic as everybody has a family, and family relationships say a lot about a person.
  • Work: Work is where one spends a major part of the week, so work is definitely a good topic to talk about.
  • School/College: School and college can be the best time of a person's life, when they are still growing, exploring, and learning. There will be lots to talk about here.
  • Friends: The kind of friends a person has and their idea about friendship is an important way to see how they build and maintain relationships.
  • Travel: Dream destinations, traveling for fun and adventure, and previous travel experiences are valuable and learning experiences. Most will be eager to share.
  • Hopes and Dreams: Everybody has some hopes and dreams that they work towards. It reveals something deep about the person.
  • Sports: Playing or following sports is a common hobby for many. Find out more about a person by asking about their interest in sports.
  • Food: Food and cuisine are an important aspect of a person's likes and dislikes. It will be helpful to know their favorite food and cuisine.


Find out more about your date by asking these questions.
  • What do you do in your free time?
  • How do you usually spend Sundays?
  • Tell me a bit about your family.
  • What has been your favorite vacation so far?
  • Is there anything you've always wanted to do, but haven't had the chance?
  • What were your childhood pets?
  • What are your major goals in life?
  • What school activities did you participate in?
  • It is more worthwhile and satisfying to improve the world or appreciate the world?


  • Tip 1: Have a confident body language.
  • Tip 2: Don't be a chatterbox.
  • Tip 3: Keep your answers concise and upbeat.
  • Tip 4: Be prepared.
  • Tip 5: Keep the date short.
  • Tip 6: Listen to your date with genuine interest.
  • Tip 7: Ask questions―talk about the food you're eating, share the conversation.
  • Tip 8: Have a few questions and conversation topics prepared in advance.
  • Tip 9: Be positive and remember that the first date is the other person's first impression of you.
  • Tip 10: You've worked hard to get this date, so think positive and enjoy yourself.
As first dates are tricky and there may be some pressure to come across as an interesting person, it is necessary to be prepared.