It's Flexting Time Peeps! Tips on Flirting Through Text Messages

Love letters are obsolete. Phone calls are passé. The coolest way to flirt these days is via text messages. Whether they’re good old SMSs or the various IM services that smartphones have, flirting through text messages is here to stay.

Introducing…the big brother of texting and the little brother of sexting: FLEXTING!
Flexting is the practice of flirting with an individual via text messages.

So, if you too have that girl or guy you want to get to know but can’t work up the courage to speak to, begin with flexting. In today’s technology-driven world, texting is a common and fun way of building up rapport. But, be warned! Just like any other practice, there are some things that are acceptable, almost imperative, and those that are frowned upon, even in this art.

We’ll give you the lowdown so you know what to do and what not to. Here are ideas provided according to situations for both, guys and girls. Also provided at the end of this article are some messages that, we assure, have worked for many! Try and test them!

Flexting Fundamentals for Girls

Say his name

If you’re the one that has initiated the texting, then make sure that you say his name, at least in the first text of every new conversation. This way he knows that he’s been on your mind.

[A message like the one above makes the conversation more personal by showing that you paid attention to what he said. It also boosts his confidence when you say he’s right about something that he thought about you.]

Ask him questions

So, did you get a chance to drink that milkshake you were craving so much last night? Thanks to you, I had one myself. 😛

If you think that the conversation is reaching that point where you’ll have to use the dreaded ‘so, what else?’, ask him questions that will enable the conversation to get back on track.

[Such a message clearly indicates that you remember something that he mentioned the previous night. Plus, it’s special cause the two of you shared something in common.]

Give hints that you want to get together

OK. Here’s the thing. Chances of a guy being brave enough to blatantly ask you out are very bleak. So, if you really like this guy and want to get together with him, then let him KNOW! You don’t have to say it in those many words, but you can definitely give him a hint that you would like to meet him.

[Here, you have suggested that the two of you meet. You haven’t overtly said that you should meet because you’re sweet on him and established that you know what can tempt him.]

Send texts that demand a response

Hi Jake! I’m thinking of buying a phone. Word on the street is you’ve got the best advice about these things. So, wanna help a damsel in distress? 😉

You can ask him about something that he’s passionate about, so he’ll be more than eager to respond. He’ll also reply if you ask him about something he told you he was looking forward to.

[Here, by asking him for help about something that is important to you, you upped his ego by making him out to be a knight in shining armor of sorts.]

Tell him he makes you laugh

Guys try real hard to make girls laugh. They’ve kinda caught on to the fact that women find guys with a sense of humor both intelligent and attractive. So, if he makes you laugh, appreciate it, and tell him. Nothing can massage a guy’s ego more than the girl he’s flirting with telling him that’s he’s funny.

[Here, you’ve not only told him that you think he’s funny; but gone one step ahead and told him that another person (also a girl) finds what he said funny too.]

Flexting Faux Pas for Girls

• Expecting him to respond to every message as soon as you send it. Guys don’t keep their phones on their person all the time. So you may have to wait longer than the 6 minutes mentioned above.

• Correcting his language. You may be a stickler for complete words in texts, but he may not entertain the same notion. So if he wnts 2 txt u lyk dis, just put up with it. There is some debate over whether or not to tolerate bad grammar in texts. You can take your call on that.

• Sending him a barrage of texts just to know if he’s OK. We girls take it as concern, guys take it as being clingy.

• Overusing emoticons. Just because the guy is making an effort with emoticons doesn’t mean you bombard him with texts that have fewer words than smileys. Unless you can some up with clever flirty messages using only them. Now that’s creativity!

Flexting Fundamentals for Guys

Say her name

Yes, we’ve told the girls to do this too. No, it’s not creepy if you use her name in texts sporadically. Just please don’t do it in every other message. THAT will be creepy.

[Simple. Sweet. To the point. Such a message lets her know that she’s on your mind. It also makes her go ‘awwww’ when she reads it ‘cos you took out the time to wish her good day.]

Be polite

Hey Sash! Hope a nice girl like you is having the nice day she deserves!

No matter what you may have heard, there is no excuse for impolite texting. You may be all ‘Yo girl wassup!’ when you meet her in person, but limit the use of such language while texting. How difficult is it really to say something like the one here?

[Such a text in no way mars the kind of rapport you two have when you meet. Plus, by using a nickname for her, you’ve made it that much more personal. Two thumbs up!]

Keep her interested

There are quite a few ways you can keep a girl interested in having a conversation with you. Think of common interests that the two of you share. Another thing you can try is tell her something totally offhand, but not completely. When you don’t give full information, she’s left asking for more.

[Here, you have used a nickname for her, sneakily told her that she was on your mind when you went to bed, AND given her a hint about something that she will definitely want to know more about.]

Talk about your last meeting

Hey Sash! Just wanted to say that I enjoyed that video you sent me. It was hilarious! 🙂 Thanks for cheering me up. 🙂

No it’s not weird if a guy uses emoticons in his texts. Most girls like it if a guy can express himself in a text without compromising his macho image. Plus, using them along with appropriate punctuation can make your message get some life.

[Use of emoticons and right punctuations makes the text lively, fun, and increases chances of getting a response.]

Tease her

Girls enjoy being christened the ‘bad girl’ at times. So, tease her. Poke fun at her. Make her feel like she’s a sweet-natured, mischievous little brat. It ups the fun quotient in your conversation and also makes her smile. Perfect for a flirty text message if you ask me.

[This response is assuming she’s just said something out of character for her. It’s the right amount of naughty, flirty and shows her that you’re excited about the fact that she can be ‘bad’ too.]

Use emoticons and punctuation

Hey Sash! Just wanted to say that I enjoyed that video you sent me. It was hilarious! 🙂 Thanks for cheering me up. 🙂

[Use of emoticons and right punctuations makes the text lively, fun, and increases chances of getting a response.]

Flexting Faux Pas for Guys

• Beginning a text asking her where she is and what she’s doing. Honestly! This is just plain old boring and lame. If you don’t have anything else to talk about, find something.

• Sending her something that could be sent to anyone. For instance, a message like, ‘Just watched this awesome movie! You must watch it too!’ could get her confused whether she was the intended recipient or not. An easy way out of this is, as mentioned above, use her name so she feels involved.

• Overusing emoticons. While using a certain amount of emoticons is OK, using more symbols than text can be interpreted as lack of interest in the conversation.

• Texting just the letter ‘K’. Every girl in her right mind would like to claw out the eyes of a guy who responds to her text with the alphabet K. What do you mean K? The element potassium? If you can type one letter, you can definitely type one more and complete the darn word. OK?