Breakups often open up new horizons for people to find the kind of love they actually deserve, and to get some time-out for themselves. So, getting over a breakup need not be as difficult as it is made out to be. Here are some tips that may help you get over your ‘lost love’.
“If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.”
The American writer Richard Bach has so aptly described a true relationship. While many people treat a breakup as just another incident, and get on with their routines, there are some who cannot tolerate the loss of their “love” and thus, become heartbroken.
One has to realize, however, that life never comes to a standstill and continues at its own pace. People have to try to overcome incidents like relationship breakups, in due course, and get on with the flow. Life does open up new and better avenues for us with every step that we put forward. So, set your best foot forward and get going! Breakup does not necessarily mean a setback. On the contrary, it may mean a new and a fresh beginning of your life.
Trying to get over a breakup? Well, in that case, you have two choices. You can either be cribbing and crying over your ‘lost love’ or accept the fact that you are no longer together, and continue with your normal life. Choose the right option and the entire world will be open for you. Given below are some of the DOs and DON’Ts which you may need to consider while dealing with your breakup blues:
DOs
There is nothing wrong in being sad.
Holding back your emotions may lead to depression. So, scream on top of your voice, if you wish. But, accept the fact that it is now a broken relationship which cannot be mended.
Talk it out to someone.
It can be a close friend, or a member of your family, but you need to let out the emotions raging inside you. Keeping your thoughts to yourself will only dump you with emotional baggage and complicate matters.
Explore the spiritual angle of your personality.
Meditate or join a spiritual healing workshop. It will help you lift your spirits and go easy on your worries.
Get away for a little while.
Traveling to an unexplored destination may be a good option. It will not only allow you to meet new people but will also distract your mind from the breakup agony.
Redo your house.
Change everything, right from wall colors to curtains to room accessories. It also involves all the gifts and souvenirs that your ex gave you. This will completely change the look of your place and thus, also flush out all the negativity and bad memories.
Go on a shopping spree.
Shopping is a great distraction, especially when you are disturbed. You don’t have to actually buy a lot many things, though. Maybe, only a cute dress or two would be enough.
Jot down your thoughts.
Scribble all your negative feelings on a piece of paper, or in a diary, and tear it off once your anger subsides. This will actually make you feel better.
Pamper yourself.
Get a makeover, or spend some time at the spa. It will just make you feel nice about yourself and lift your spirits.
Indulge in hobbies.
Involving yourself in your favorite hobby, or cultivating a new one, can be a great spirit booster that will keep all the negative energies away from you.
Adopt a pet.
Research has proven that interacting with animals helps people heal emotionally. Pets are great companions and can prove to be major catalysts in reducing your ailments.
Keep your heart open.
Breakup is not the end of the world. Life definitely has something better in store for you. Whatever it is, a new prospect or a new relationship, give it a warm welcome in your life.
Learn a lesson.
Crying over a bad breakup, or simply trying to get away from it, is not enough. It is essential that you learn from the experience and mend your ways such that nobody can hurt you ever again.
DON’Ts
Never enter into a rebound relationship.
Rebound relationships are often hasty decisions, people tend to make after their breakups. They do not help much, and many a time only end up complicating matters further. Avoid hurting the other guy/gal.
Don’t plead before your ex for love.
What is done is done and your ex will not come back to you. You will only end up losing your self-dignity.
Don’t try to get in touch with your ex, at least for some time.
Not contacting your ex will help you recover faster, and will also make you realize that you can survive even without him/her.
Don’t overdo things.
Stop stuffing yourself with extra food or alcohol in a hope to get rid of your sorrow. This will only adversely affect your health. At the same time, stop overloading yourself with work. It will not help you forget your ex in any manner.
Don’t play God.
If you are the one responsible for the breakup, there is no need to feel guilty about your partner’s plight. Do not try to show sympathy or to hook your partner up with somebody else. This will only add to your partner’s grief.
Don’t stalk his/her ‘Facebook’ profile.
Do not visit your ex’s profile on social networking sites. Even a random message from a random person can be enough to disturb you. Just delete him/her from your friends list.
Don’t meet his friends and family.
See to it that you do not keep any sort of contact with his friends or family. This will bring back old memories, and add to your melancholy.
Avoid going to places where he/she usually hangs out.
This will not bring you face-to-face with your ex, and will aid in your post-breakup recovery.
Don’t try to take revenge.
Even if you feel betrayed after the breakup, revenge is not the solution. This is because in the process of getting revenge, you tend to think more and more about the breakup and thus, will find it very hard to overcome the pain.
Stop being jealous.
If your ex is now involved with someone else, do not find faults either in that person or in yourself. You will never be able to get over your breakup in his way.
Healing a Broken Heart: The Celebrity Way
Celebrities are no exception to the phenomenon of relationship breakups. But, owing to the glamor and glitz attached to their lives, everything that they do becomes news and so, whatever they do is “exceptionally stylish”.
★ Katie Price chose to party hard in Ibiza after her breakup with Peter Andre.
★ Following her troubled relationship and a bad breakup, singer Adele decided to convert her sorrow into art and came up with her album named 21 which narrates the story of her break-up.
★ Post breaking up with Justin Fabrizo Moretti, Drew Barrymore got her hairdo changed by which she managed to get a lot of attention.
★ After breaking up with her lover Samantha Ronson, Lindsay Lohan got a tattoo made on her wrist that said, “Stars – all we ask for is the right to twinkle.”
★ Shortly after breaking up with Ryan Phillippe, Reese Witherspoon changed her hairstyle by getting a bang haircut.
★ Brit actress Kate Winslet tried to get over her breakup by dating model Louis Dowler shortly after.
Relationships are personal to everyone, and can sometimes be complicated. However, not all relations work out as desired, and some of them eventually end up breaking. It is however, not necessary that all relations that break up turn out to be ugly. There have been cases, wherein romantic relationships have blossomed into beautiful everlasting friendships. After all, life doesn’t end with a breakup. As Alexander Graham Bell has put it, “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”