Developing romantic feelings for your best pal? Continue reading to know why it might be a bad idea.
*In this article, the reader has been assumed to be a girl, solely for convenience of writing. However, the advice mentioned below caters to both genders.
Your best friend is almost your better half in many ways than one. You are with each other through thick and thin, in sadness and in joy. When you are so in sync with someone, it is only natural to feel for that person. Your friendship has already made sure that you share everything―feelings, things, clothes maybe, time, hobbies, etc. With so much to connect over, and so many experiences to make you stronger, your bond with your best friend is only going to grow stronger. However, if you start developing romantic feelings for him, it’s time you contemplate a little; it may not be such a great idea after all.
Note: In this article, we have assumed that your best friend doesn’t like you or likes someone else. If this isn’t the case, there is no harm in trying to make him fall for you.
Clear Your Thoughts
The first thing you need to think about is whether you really have feelings for him or if it’s just a temporary phase. Thinking more about these things will help you to clear your thoughts for the better. You need to think when this started and how. Sometimes, unnecessary situations lead to building up of temporary feelings that eventually fade away. Are you just used to him being around?
Tell Yourself This Can’t Happen
Tell yourself why this is a bad idea altogether. Make a list of reasons why you guys shouldn’t be together. Think over things that make you a bad couple. Maybe after looking at both the sides, you’ll come to terms with the fact that this wasn’t a good idea after all. Do you want to complicate your friendship, embarrassing yourself in the process, and creating an awkwardness that’s never going to go away? If you conclude that there is no way you can live without him and that your feelings are genuinely very intense, then you have no choice but to take a risk.
Reduce the Hanging Out
Hang out with him a bit less day by day. Don’t just stop meeting him one fine day; this will be an extreme step that might just raise unnecessary suspicion. If you meet him a little less than you usually, the intensity of what you have suddenly started feeling for him might reduce. This will also help both of you to get used to not continuously being together. Sometimes, you just get so used to being with someone that you feel staying apart can never be possible. In this situation, you need to try your best to maintain that distance.
Contemplate the Consequences
One of the best ways to discourage yourself against this idea is to think about the consequences. What if he thinks you’re stupid to think something like this? What if he loves someone else and you have to then face all the embarrassment? What if he panics and stops talking to you? What if he thinks you’re insane to think so much into everything? The answers to all these questions might just discourage you against the whole idea and for good.
Talk It Out
If you think that your best friend is understanding enough and won’t take things to his heart, you can think about talking it out with him. He might tell you himself why it is such a bad idea to think about something that might ruin the friendship that exists right now. If you can’t talk it out with him, think of a friend you can confide in. S/he might be able to give your feelings a proper direction.
In most cases, best friends start dating each other thinking there is no reason why they shouldn’t. There have also been times when a beautiful, romantic relationship has blossomed out of a friendship. However, you need to understand that a romantic relationship requires a different type of intimacy. Dating your best friend might just hamper the equation you guys share right now. So, think twice before you act!