Individuals with an INTJ personality are considered to be brainy, who are constantly on a quest to seek knowledge. However, when it comes to their emotional side, they find it difficult to express their feelings. This LoveBondings article provides information on INTJ relationship compatibility with other personality types.
Overview of the INTJ Personality
► Introversion: They are reserved and quiet.
► INtuitive: They trust their intuition and look at the bigger picture.
► Thinking: They need logic and reasoning behind everything.
► Judgment: They’re well planned in their activities.
They constitute to around 3-4% of the U.S. population, INTJs are usually known to use their heads, instead of hearts. They usually have a checklist to determine their partners. They will look for partners who satisfy certain parameters, and after a gradual process of dating, decide on the appropriateness of the partner. Stability and reliability is their need. They’re serious in their relationships and will not waste their time in occasional flings.
Usually good in the science and engineering field, they’ll seek logic behind everything. As knowledge seekers, they have an inherent desire to solve problems. As partners they make good mates, since they usually occupy high positions and ranks, and earn a handsome salary. They’re extremely confident about their work, and loyal in everything they do.
Positive Traits of INTJs in a Relationship
► They’re extremely loyal and committed, and will not invest their time in casual affairs or relationships.
► They are good listeners and will take keen interest in whatever you say, especially if it is something that can add to their knowledge, they are all ears for it!
► They are stable and usually earn handsome salaries.
► They possess high level of confidence.
► They’re open and can sustain criticism; however, everything should have a logic behind it.
► They can move out of a relationship without brooding over it for a very long time.
If You’re Dating an INTJ
► Understand their thirst for knowledge. Keep their ‘brains’ pleased, and engage in some activities that will challenge their thinking capacity. A visit to a book exhibition, science fair, museums, etc., will please them no end.
► Try to explain the reason and logic behind your thoughts. If you disagree with him/her, do not try to emotionally blackmail him, as it may prove harmful for your relationship.
► Display a higher sense of dedication in everything you do, he will definitely appreciate it. Try to generate a liking in his hobbies and interests. INTJs love exploring new things, and usually need everything to make sense.
► Appreciate their intelligence and problem-solving skills.
Problems With INTJ Relationships
► INTJs do not exhibit their romantic side easily, and do not find the need to engage in emotional talks. That does not imply that they do not value their relationships and are not romantic at heart. It is just difficult for them to express their feelings. They appear to be arrogant sometimes.
► They need to be told about your expectations. It is difficult for them to interpret your feelings, as they prefer being told what your need is. They expect the truth to be told.
►They’ll probably not engage in ‘little acts of love’, and small talks, which is the emotional need of every relationship.
►They can be demanding in a relationship.
►Due to their obsession with making sense out of everything and trying to find logic, they try to analyze their partner’s every thought and action.
► They can be overtly blunt and honest, which might not go well with their partners.
► They find it difficult to express their feelings, and will not like to be interrupted, while immersed in their work.
► INTJs have a tendency to be obsessed with perfection.
INTJ and ENFP: Opposites Attract!
David Keirsey, American psychologist and generator of the Keirsey Personality Sorter, was of the opinion that the best match for an INTJ type would be an ENFP. Matching the Idealist (ENFP) and the Rational (INTJ), will be the most beneficial, true to the saying that opposites attract. Both need each other to clear out the void and negatives that both possess. ENFPs usually have the zeal and excitement of a child, are bubbly and cheerful. It is very difficult for them to keep their excitement at bay.
However, they’re very sensitive and caring towards others. Both personalities have ‘intuition’ as their primary trait. With their effective communication skills and talkative nature, ENFPs can induce INTJs to bring out their ‘humane’ side. On the other hand, ENFPs will appreciate INTJs natural intelligent and mature approach towards life. ENFPs can provide the warmth and affection required in a relationship, which might be attractive to INTJs.
However, since ‘intuition’ is the common factor, they can engage in deep conversations about ideas, thoughts, and visions, without caring about the passage of time.
Since they’re opposite, they need to respect and accept their differences. ENFPs are ‘Feeling’ personalities, and hence, they feel the need to be emotional, which might be difficult for the INTJs to comprehend. However, it is said that INTJ females usually prefer to have someone who is similar to their personality type.
INTJ and ENTP Compatibility
ENTPs are visionaries and share the ‘intuitive’ and ‘thinking’ personality traits of INTJs. However, ENTPs find it easier to connect with the outside world, unlike INTJs who want their own, quiet, reserved places. This major difference in outlook must be taken care of, to make this relationship work. Both have a desire to seek new ideas.
INTJ and INFJ Compatibility
Both types have all the personality traits in common, except the ‘thinking and feeling’ factors, which may cause mutual attraction between them. The feeling partner will like the latter’s logical thinking, whereas the thinking partner will like the other’s emotional side. Both are private and reserved in nature, and will have a good time having deep discussions. However, the common problem of emotional needs that can’t be satisfied by an INTJ, will crop up. To make the relationship work, they have to respect their differences, as both are rare personalities with the ability to think deep.
Other possible compatible personality types are: ENFJ, INTP, INFP, INTJ, ENTJ.
In short, INTJs like to be creative with problem solving, and hence, need a partner who allows them to be their goal-seekers, and understands their passion to seek knowledge.
Note: The above suggestions are simply for reference purpose. The author does not intend to give any relationship advice. While different INTJs can have different personality preferences as partners, the above examples are simply based on common observations.