The emotional effort and strength involved in keeping a long distance relationship going is something that is truly understood and appreciated only by people who have been in one. However, it’s not always moping and sulking around. There are some brilliant things you can do to keep romance in the air, even if the air is on different continents.
You’re in a long distance relationship; it may be just for a season or a couple of years, it may be because your career needs it or because of family commitments. Reason and circumstances may vary, but the bottom line is that you’ve decided to make it last despite the geography of it all. You’ve decided to be mature about it and handle it with dignity and elegance.
Yes, it all sounds peachy when you’re reading or writing about it. When it comes to actually making it happen, the scene is quite different. But it isn’t impossible. Difficult? Yes. Tricky? Hell yeah! Impossible? No. That’s because if you’re ready to go that extra mile, there’s nothing that can prevent your relationship from blossoming. What you can do to keep the proverbial ‘spark’ and ‘romance’ alive is….
Become Pen Pals
Take it upon yourselves to preserve the long-lost art of letter-writing. The ability of snail mail to bring a smile on one’s face has been so grossly undermined, it’s almost ridiculous. Take time out to hand-write a letter to your partner on a regular basis. Even if it’s just a goofy song that you made up on the run. Or you could ask each other a question in one letter, and have them answer in their next. This will bring you close to each other in a manner most intimate.
Have a Courier Calendar
Joe DiMaggio had roses placed at the crypt of his one-time wife, Marilyn Monroe, for 20 years after she died. Did you just go ‘awww’ in your head? Well, you can take a cue from this gesture of love by having something delivered to your partner on a pre-decided date every month. Pick a date, have a deal set up with a courier company, and have the same thing delivered to him or her every month. It could be flowers, a box of favorite chocolates, a cake, or anything he/she likes.
Exploit the Internet
Ever thought about a virtual date? It’s quite simple really. All you need is food, wine, candles, your cell phones switched off, and a dependable Internet connection. Or if you’re not in the mood for wining and dining, how about going shopping together, online? Make a shopping list and have each other on video chat while you browse through the plethora of online stores to pick and choose things for yourselves and each other.
Make a Video Letter
Instead of going through the (apparently) time-consuming and arduous chore of writing a letter, you could make a virtual one. Get dressed up, switch on your recording device and speak your heart out; about how much you love him or her, about things around you that remind you of him or her, about things you wish you’ll could do together, and the like. Send it to your partner via any of the gazillion modes of sending videos there exist. Now that’s what I call a pleasant surprise.
Plan your Future
There’s nothing more reassuring in a relationship than planning a future together. Distance does make the heart grow fonder. So, when you’re sitting miles apart from each other, it’s great to know that your partner eagerly anticipates the time that you will eventually spend together. Talk as much as you can about a future that you will share. Talk about what you’ll name your kids. Talk about growing old together. Talk about everything that will make the two of you feel close together always.
Pay a Surprise Visit
The single most romantic thing one can do when in a long distance relationship is drop in unexpectedly at the partner’s doorstep. What more can one ask for than to be surprised by the one person they miss the most? So, plan a visit and ensure everything is perfect. Have an entire weekend planned for the two of you. Just make sure that he or she does not have any prior commitments. Even better, ask a common friend to fake a prior commitment and let it turn out to be YOU!
When you come to think of it, a long distance relationship today is quite different, and dare I say easier to handle than what it was probably a decade ago. Technology has made the world so small that you’re just a mouse-click or a tap away from each other. But nothing, I repeat, nothing, can make up for the actual presence, the touch and the feel of the one you love. So, hang in there. You’ll pull through. I’ll leave you with these wonderful lines by Liz in the movie Like Crazy, which managed to capture the essence of a long distance relationship quite remarkably,
… when I was working in NY, my husband was in LA, so he was driving across country. So, on the way over he would take all these pictures of himself and the dog at various places. So, I sent photos of me and we got all of them together, and they were all the moments and time being separate, but yet we were together on these photographs.