Ladies, listen up... So you know what guys are all about? You think you have them figured out perfectly? Surprise, surprise! I don't think so. Sure, you might know some stray things about them, I'll give you that. But there are so many other, more important things girls should know about guys. Maybe you haven't ever given it a thought. Men have their secrets too... they have their quirks. Want to know what they are? Well then let's go on a journey shall we? Hold on to your seats, this one's going to be a bumpy ride.
General Facts About Guys
- A guy thinks about sex every 30 seconds. Or maybe it's 7. Yup, he's thought of you, his teacher, the news lady on TV in every possible scenario.
- Guys love to gossip! No matter how much of a hard time they give you about it, they love it. Don't believe me? The next time you are alone, just start a discussion about a common friend and see how the things will flow.
- Nothing makes a guy more uncomfortable than when you talk about your periods.
- A guy will HATE his girl's best guy friend/ex-boyfriend(s). No. Matter. What. (So don't expect them to be friends).
- Subtle hints never ever work with guys. You want something? Just say it out loud.
- Guys will never understand your need to have bright fuchsia crocs. According to them, if you have more than three pairs of footwear, it is by default, equal to waaaay too many shoes.
- A guy does not care if you take a pink scarf or a purple scarf over your shirt, as long as you are dressed on time.
- A guy loves the remote. More than sex sometimes.
Funny Facts About Guys
- A guy will hate asking for directions. They go by the principle "Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we." (Pack a survival kit, the next time you are out in the unknown)
- Guys don't know what mauve, ocher, and peach are... it's purple, red, and orange to them. Period.
- Guys don't know (and never want to know) who Nick from the back street boys is. He could be anyone of them blue-eyed, baby-voiced blondies for all they care.
- A guy will faze out when you use words like 'shopping', 'gladiators', 'my mother'...
- A guy will invariably get you a stuffed toy for your birthday. (Like I said, subtle hints never work).
- A guy loves when you call him by cute names... but will refuse to acknowledge the mere presence of you, if you say it in front of his friends. (Snigger, snigger. Try it sometimes).
- No matter how much he says he hates your pet cat 'Tinky-binky', you'll probably find him going 'who's the cutie pie' one morning. (Hehe!).
Secrets About Guys
- Guys cry. But they won't be caught dead doing it in front of anyone. (Never tease a guy about that. Trust me.)
- All guys have watched porn at sometime or the other in their lives. (Have watched?! Watch! As in present tense.)
- Men love to watch romantic flicks sometimes... read―sometimes. (If you can catch them at a weak moment, that is. Wearing a mini when you ask, might help)
- When a guy likes a girl he will stop acting all macho and try to find excuses to be near her.
- Guys fear rejection like the plague.
- Guys love girls who get along with their moms. (Big whoop...)
- Most guys will pee in the shower. (Euuu!)
- All men have used a ruler to measure their penis. (Err..?)
- All guys will have looked up Pamela Anderson on the search engine at least once.
- Guys will never remember the pointers of the last argument. There's no point saying "But you said that the last time". Absolutely zilch.
Sometimes strange, sometimes vague, sometimes so gross (peeing in the shower guys? Really?), sometimes so unbelievably sweet, and sometimes just plain old predictable. Men will be men. So girls, now that you had a peep into some things girls should know about guys, what's the plan?