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How to Be a Good Kisser

A List of Vital Pointers to Teach You How to Be a Good Kisser

How many more dates will you sit through, dreading the time you have to kiss him/her good night? And how many more dates will you cancel hoping to avoid the unavoidable? Not after this piece, you won't. By the time you're done reading this LoveBondings piece, you'll have some of the best kissing tips and tricks in your kitty. What's more, you will be raring to go.
Rujuta Borkar
Last Updated: May 16, 2018
"I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them."

―Mae West
Finally you are at her doorstep. There's no mistletoe in sight but the moment is so damn right. She looks over with nervous expectation. You can see it in her eyes―her eyes, a soft, doe-eyed mirage, Kohl-lined and almond-shaped, blinking and looking down. Nervous laughter playing at her lips ... down to the ground she looks, then right up to meet your gaze. The fragrance of her perfume, her hair, courses through your whole being, lifting your senses. The evening has been magical and this moment here is the crescendo to it all ... you want to kiss her. You know she wants you to. But ... Should I? You wonder. Will she like it? Will I put her off if I don't do it right? What does she like? I wish I hadn't taken her out to dinner.

... And just like that, the sensuous rhythm of the air is brought to a crashing halt because you suddenly decide to get an attack of the nerves. That is just not done! So what do we do now? First, get a grip of yourself, and then continue reading, 'cause after you've got some much-needed tips on how to be a good kisser (there should not be any other kind anyway), you'll be making some girl go very, very weak in her knees. So sit back and take notes. Then? Then go practice.
Being a Good Kisser (for Guys)
Assess the Situation
You can't just rush into a kiss. There should be things that should lead to a kiss―this will heighten the pleasure much more. Have you been flirting throughout the evening? Good. Have you got the vibes that she's as much into you, as you are into her? Better. So now that you know she wants you to kiss her, it'll be easier for you. But if you are not sure, then just try a simple pulling her to yourself and gently kissing her lips―if she doesn't like it, she'll push you away.
Getting Started
When you are close together, lean into her and softly, very softly, brush your lips against hers. If she does not want to kiss you, and you read the signals wrong, she won't let you go any further (be sure of that). That's when you should pull away. But if she's into you, she will most probably always close her eyes and lean in closer. This is when you press your lips against hers. Remember to be very gentle. Initiate the kiss and let it linger. Don't rush into it and push your tongue down her throat.
The French Kiss
The French kiss is hands down one of the most passionate kissing styles. French kissing is when you bring in your tongues when you're kissing. But it is not necessary to lead into a French kiss immediately. That could wait for another day. Yet, if you want to experiment, just open your mouth slightly and let your tongue outline her lips. Just slightly. If she wants to head into the French kiss, she'll part her lips and try to match you action for action. That's when you take the hint and go in for the kiss. Experiment with the kind of pressure and force you want to use. Don't forget to key in for some positive signs like sighing or soft moaning from her, and you'll have enough to go by―knowing what she likes or doesn't.
Use Your Hands
Kissing isn't just about the mouths. Initiating your hands into the process and knowing how to use them to your advantage is also an important lesson to learn in being a good kisser. While you are kissing her, run your hands over her hair (very passionate). Or simply push a strand of hair behind her ear. Or you could hold your hands at the small of her back―which gives a very protective feeling. You could also run them very lightly over her arms―up and down―like literally a feather touch. Girls love this kind of stuff. Or you could grab her jawline with both hands while kissing her―there is no clearer signal than this to show that you want her ... bad.
Use Variations
The French kiss is not the only kiss that you need to learn to be a good kisser. Learn to bring in a variety of kisses and she'll be begging for more. Many times, guys just stick to one type of kissing, and that can get really boring. Vary the kissing styles from time to time.

Try the lick kiss―run your tongue over her lips and outline them in slow motion. Or the earlobe kiss―run your tongue over your partner's ears and gently nibble on them. Placing light kisses and blowing into the ear very gently is also known to heighten one's heartbeats and make the temperature rise (among other things). Similarly, try kissing the neck, eyes, forehead chin, and jaws, as well as experimenting with varied pressure tactics―she'll be putty in your hands.
Keep Things in Check
There are some things that you need to keep in check before you even attempt to kiss someone.
  • Make sure you have fresh breath. Nothing will put off someone like bad breath.
  • Dress well. Don't wear shabby clothes and flaunt a disheveled appearance.
  • Be in control of your hands and tongue. Don't go overboard, or you'll scare her away.
  • Be confident and it'll show in the way you kiss.
  • Learn to read her signs and see if she's into something that you are trying, or is trying to push you off. Nothing will put off a girl more if someone is forcing himself on her.
Being a Good Kisser (for Girls)
Gone are the days when guys were expected to make the first move. Who says girls can't make the first move? Not to bring in the issue of equality or anything, but simply because sometimes a guy is scared, worrying himself to death, wondering whether he should be kissing you or not. So why not just help him out a little? Guys love it if girls make the first move. Anything else is a myth. And if used well, it can be a major turn on as well ... but not to digress, here are a few pointers for you.
Using Your Hands
Just as girls love it when guys use their hands to heighten the kiss, guys love it too. Use your hands to run them over his shoulders or neck or run them through his hair and you'll see him instantly relax and get into the act more. Heck, why stop at the hands―use your nails as well. Lightly brush the tip of your nails over his shoulder, neck, arms, and face. Let's just say you (and he) will not be disappointed with what will follow. Also, ears―another very sensitive area―use it to the maximum by gently pulling at them with your hands or with your teeth as a variation to the kissing.
Respond to his Kisses
Love what he's doing with his tongue? Well don't be a prude ... let him know. That does not mean stopping in the middle of the act and announcing it―just moan softly or sigh, and he will not only know that you love it, but will be encouraged enough to continue doing what he's doing.
Pull Away
Here's a real teaser. Midway into the kiss just pull away and don't let him kiss you. Have a mischievous smile playing at your lips to let him know that you're teasing. Do anything to stall him for 5 - 6 seconds―purse your lips, draw your head back ... when he finally 'catches' you, see the passion escalate. This should probably be used only if you want it to lead to other things.
Try Some Variations
Shock him with some really, really wild kisses. Ask him to have a hot cup of tea while you have a cool drink, then when you kiss, the clashing sensations of hot and cold will be just short of fireworks. Or blindfold him and then kiss him―having one of his senses blocked will only heighten the others and the kiss will be so intense―a little too intense, maybe? Nah!
Check Up On It
Just as it is important that guys take care of their appearance and style, their breath and force, so also, it is important that girls do the same. Here's an extra pointer that will drive the guys wild! Keep your lips soft and supple by using a lip balm before sleeping every night. They'll never want to let you go. You can also dab on some nice perfume that he can associate with you henceforth.
Kissing with Braces
Braces put a mental block, even when there is no need to have one. The only thing that can happen when kissing with braces is that you have to be a little careful. Other than that, one can kiss quite normally even if they have braces. You need to just experiment with what suits you―that's all. But if you are still a little skeptical, here are a few pointers to help you out.
  • Wait for about a month if you have just fit the braces. The soreness will be gone by then.
  • Don't keep putting yourself down over and over again because of the braces. This will have a negative effect on you, without you even realizing it.
  • Tell your partner beforehand that you need to take things slow. This will keep things in check and you won't end up hurting yourself.
  • Initiate the kiss with closed lips at first so that you get the hang of it. Don't be brash and employ extra force.
  • After you have got the hang of the kiss with your eyes closed and the tension has eased off, you can move on to other types of kisses as well.
  • Again, the key here is being as gentle as possible. Experiment with what suits your palate (pun intended) and take it from there.
  • In reality, there is really no reason for you to fear because the new range of braces have been specially designed for lending more comfort.
Kissing someone for the first time can be a little, or a whole lot intimidating ... especially if you really, really like them. But if these simple pointers are anything to go by, there's no need for that at all. You're good to go. You really like her/him―let your kisses do the telling.