Can communication be taken as the single most important prerequisite to keep a marriage together? Or is communication an overly hyped commodity? Is the lack of communication in a marriage reason enough to lead to the downfall of that relationship? The following article will look at some of these key factors and try to understand this issue in all its entirety.
He comes home late everyday, tired and strained. She reaches before him, sometimes after. Silence reigns. They try and ebb away the tiredness from their very bones. A paper pile comes into sight and a fight ensues. It goes on and on. He turns away that night and she cries to sleep. The words 'I need you' she does not bring to her lips. The next morning breakfast happens as if nothing was ever wrong. They break their silence with strained talk, shoving issues under the carpet, they go along. They leave home only to return again the night later, strained and tired and another fight to catch up on. And more issues to shove under the carpet...
Importance of Communication
Did you know that lack of communication is taken to be the most potent reason from among all other reasons for divorce? That just goes to show what the importance of communication is in a relationship, especially in a marriage. Any relationship needs a strong base of effective communication to be able to sustain itself. Look at it this way, when two individuals come together in marriage, they are sharing their life. But they are, after all, two separate individuals with their own likes and dislikes, values, beliefs and ideas. Without the tool of effective communication, how is one to build a relationship and more so over, make a success of it? 'Cause when two people share a life, they need to know everything about the other person to be able to go on with them and avoid any problems. And that is what communication will provide for.
Lack of Communication and Divorce
Communication is referred to as the base of a healthy relationship. Great communication leads to having an open and frank conversation about every single issue that a couple faces. It helps them get closer and therefore makes the relationship stronger. Without communication, there is a visible weakening of the base. The ability to communicate and solve problems, doubts, and issues is lost and that leads to festering of issues that lead to the downfall of a relationship.
Stemming of Issues
Communication takes up the base of a relationship, if that is not strong it can lead to several underlying relationship issues. Here are some of the issues that a lack o communication in marriage can lead to:
- Fights ~ Greater issues don't get solved and therefore there is more focus on the small issues. As a result fights become common and there is negativity felt. No relationship can thrive in a negative environment.
- Mistrust ~ Mistrust and suspicion begins to grow, further threatening to break the bond.
- Insecurity ~ When there is no effective communication, there is no manner in which a secure relationship can be built. This leads to rising tensions because either or both partners begin to feel insecure in that relationship.
- Lack of Understanding ~ Not communicating effectively well directly relates to key issues that are ignored in a relationship. Thus the feeling of a lack of understanding and being misunderstood is common.
- Drifting Apart ~ When the need to communicate with the other stops being so important, a common outcome is that of drifting apart by thoughts and actions. This is one of the main reasons that leads to infidelity in marriage.
- Lack of Growth ~ When there is no communication, the means of growing and evolving into a mature relationship becomes impossible. Thus stagnation occurs.
Lack of communication in marriage is a serious problem and needs to be dealt with early in a relationship so that it does not escalate into further issues and eventually lead to a divorce. There are ways in which effective communication can be carried out through couples communication exercises which teach you how to communicate effectively. It becomes imperative that every couple understands the importance of communication and learns to apply it in their marriage. Only then can they hope to make it a fulfilling and successful relationship that they both want to cherish and nurture, and most importantly, a relationship that makes them happy.