We talk about the quality of product and service. What about the quality of our relationships and the quality of our communications and the quality of our promises to each other? - Max de Pree
A quiet house in the suburbs, with a lush green lawn, a big backyard for barbecue parties, a cute little white picket fence and a cobbled pathway leading to your doorstep. Well, we all dream of making a home like this! Newlyweds who move into a place of their own, begin to realize this dream as they begin setting up their own nest. But the surrealism soon gets transmuted to stark reality, as the burden of household chores begins to build up. Often times, spouses expect the other to pick up significant load of domestic tasks. But with both partners working full-time to support a decent lifestyle, it is simply unfair for just one person to take care of household responsibilities. The mounting pressure of work can make that person feel like they are being taken for granted in the relationship. This can further lead to unnecessary rifts and make just one of you extremely overworked. Thus, create a feeling of being taken for granted.
Even if the case is such that one of you is a homemaker, it is important to share domestic duties because that's a way of building a home and being equally responsible. For newlyweds this is especially important, as these mundane chores can be interesting points for bonding and showing how much you care for one another. This LoveBondings article will take a look at some of the routine household chores for newlyweds that can be turned into fun things to do together.
How to Make New Beginnings Easy...
Laundry is a task that includes more than one activity. From collecting soiled clothes, to putting them in the washing machine, waiting for the cycle to get over and then drying them. At times, one also has to segregate colored clothes from the white ones, to prevent a mishap. To assign this chore, first decide how many times a week are you going to do the laundry and who can spend a little more time on this. For instance, if your husband gets free early in the evenings, while you are caught up making dinner, he can take up the task.
Washing dishes is as laborious a task as making a meal. And when you are cleaning up the kitchen, after the guests have left, there can be a huge pile of dishes to do. However big this task may seem, it is equally important to get it done. Leaving a cluttered sink with used dishes overnight is bad idea, as it can leave a stench the next day. Between the two of you, this task can be taken up alternately. For instance, if you wife has been doing the dishes for one week, the next week is your turn to clear the sink. If either one of you is fine with taking up the sole responsibility of the task entirely by trading a few other tasks, that could also be a suitable arrangement.
Sorting Out the Fridge
Oftentimes, while clearing the table, we tend to dump the leftovers in the fridge. We keep doing this until the fridge can take no more, as it is filled to its maximum capacity. This can be a tipping point for an argument for many couples. Empty water bottles, stale food packets and items beyond the date of expiry are some of the unwanted items that can cause fights. Such a situation is perfectly avoidable if one takes up the responsibility of sorting out the fridge. For instance, one of you can fill up water bottles, while the other keeps a track of what goes in the fridge after dinner. This way the chore can be easily divided between the two of you.
Cleaning the House
Keeping the house clean is the mother of all household chores! It can be a huge task which comprises dusting, moping, sweeping, washing bathrooms and gardening (if you have one). It is unfair to expect just one of the two to take up this huge responsibility. To ease the pressure of this daily task, its subsets can be divided. For instance, the wife can take up sweeping and washing bathrooms, while the husband takes up gardening and moping the floors. These tasks can be exchanged monthly or weekly, to takeaway the monotony that might set in. Also, if you acquire the habit of putting things into their rightful place immediately, a huge effort will be saved while keeping the house neat and tidy.
Paying the Bills
Electricity bill, newspaper bill, telephone bills and other such payments have to be made on a monthly basis. Although this is a regular household duty, its financial element takes a different meaning and it is one of the most common mistakes newlyweds make while sharing responsibility. The best way to deal with this situation is to divide the monetary burdens equally. This way nobody has to bear it alone, it also negates the scope for an ego battle over who takes care of whom better. The other aspect of this job is keeping in mind the deadlines. File your bills and set reminders for when they have to be paid. Set a date by which you pay off the outstanding expenses for the month, to streamline your savings and expenditures.
The crucial part of this household job, is keeping an inventory record. You have to know the items you have in the kitchen, in the fridge, what you will need in the coming week or the month, what is your budget and, if at all you are likely to have guests, how much extra will you need. Also, buying grocery can be expensive. Once again, it can be shared alternately over weeks or can be taken up by either of the two in lieu of some other task.
Listing out the regular tasks involved in running a household will give the two of you a good understanding of the workload. This is also a way of eliminating the scope for argument over who does what and how much. Setting a routine of sharing household chores can benefit in the long run, as it will act as an example for your children, lessen arguments, and help in reducing the initial friction between the two of you. After all, there is reason why they say, sharing is caring!